Everywhere we turn it seems that temperatures are rising, and I’m not talking about climate change. There have always been people with hot tempers who judge and speak too quickly. We see tempers flaring in traffic and in public demonstrations. Anger is displayed by parents towards teachers at our children’s schools. Text messages, or more public social media, are filled with vitriol, false or misleading accusations, things that we could never imagine ever saying to someone’s face, but now they are being said in airports, on airplanes, in shopping centers and even in the venerated halls of our churches and systems of government.

I have been guilty of unwise words and anger throughout my life and especially in my youth. Most all of us, at one time or another, and more often than not, have jumped to a conclusion. As a result an unkind remark or expression was made, unwise actions pursued, we got a little too high on the horse, or even found ourselves hoping or perhaps even regrettably praying for consequences to befall those with whom we have trouble. This has always been a difficulty for mankind, else why would we have been cautioned of the Savior, “that which cometh out of the mouth, this defileth a man” (Matthew 15:11)? Nevertheless, it seems that temperatures have been rising to a boiling point in the past decades, and especially in the last couple of years, threatening civility’s altogether demise.

The peace, joy and paradise of civility need not be lost. Kind words are healing words and can begin with us. As we read in Proverbs 16:24: “Pleasant words are as an honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and health to the bones.” We can start with ourselves in lowering those temperatures by how we communicate with our families, friends and associates, even with our philosophical enemies. Hey, we can start by perhaps limiting our all too free use of the label enemy, bringing true sweetness to our souls and health to our bones.

I think everybody’s mom has taught their child to speak kind words and to act in like manner. I am very fond of the way this lesson was taught in the 1942 animated Disney film classic Bambi. Thumper, a bunny just beginning to learn his own way in the world, comments to Bambi‘s mother in what sounds judgmental on Bambi‘s difficulty in walking. Thumper’s mother quickly reminded him, “Thumper, what did your father tell you?” Thumper knew instantly his error and repentantly repeats, “If you can’t say somethin’ nice, don’t say nothin’ at all!” Think, if we could all keep this lesson in our hearts, and apply it in every circumstance, how much more sweet and less bitter would be our communications with our fellow beings.

The Apostle Paul taught clearly and concisely the manner in which we should and should not communicate one with another as followers of Christ and children of God. “Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers. And grieve not the holy Spirit of God, whereby ye are sealed unto the day of redemption. Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you” (Ephesians 4:29-32).

If I may speak for our time and for our day, likening the scripture to ourselves, I think I would paraphrase to say, “Let no corrupt communication proceed out of our mouths, nor from our fingers through devices electric, neither by video to be seen of men or simply to satisfy for vanity’s sake, but only that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers, lift hearts and restore hope in an angry day. Grieve not the Lord nor His Holy Spirit to whom we rely wholly for our own hope, inner peace and salvation. Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from us, with all malice and any other desire to exact revenge, have the last word, or cause harm to those who we may feel have brought harm to us: And be kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven us.”

“And be kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven us.”

Ephesians 4:32

I am reminded of a favorite hymn written by Joseph L. Townsend (1849-1942), Let Us Oft Speak Kind Words.

Let us oft speak kind words to each other
At home or where’er we may be;
Like the warblings of birds on the heather,
The tones will be welcome and free.
They’ll gladden the heart that’s repining,
Give courage and hope from above,
And where the dark clouds hide the shining,
Let in the bright sunlight of love.

Oh, the kind words we give shall in memory live
And sunshine forever impart.
Let us oft speak kind words to each other;
Kind words are sweet tones of the heart.

Like the sunbeams of morn on the mountains,
The soul they awake to good cheer;
Like the murmur of cool, pleasant fountains,
They fall in sweet cadences near.
Let’s oft, then, in kindly toned voices,
Our mutual friendship renew,
Till heart meets with heart and rejoices
In friendship that ever is true.

Oh, the kind words we give shall in memory live
And sunshine forever impart.
Let us oft speak kind words to each other;
Kind words are sweet tones of the heart.

The Lord said, “Therefore, strengthen your brethren in all your conversation, in all your prayers, in all your exhortations, and in all your doings” (Doctrine and Covenants 108:7).

May our conversations, be they face-to-face, on handheld devices, through televised moderators, across negotiating tables, on social media, and most certainly across the dinner table, be for strengthening and providing hope. May our honest prayers be soul searching with a quest to find understanding from He who has created and loves us all. When we teach and seek to move others in paths that are for what we see as the common good, let our intentions be worthy as our methods in doing so, that we may urge and inspire instead of criticize, command and condemn. Finally, let our actions, our deeds, the way we deal with our brothers and sisters on earth, be the ultimate example and testimony of this strengthening and uplifting communication to which we aspire. In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.